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PUMPING IRONY: Growing Old, Gaining Weight
By Craig CoxA new study explains why we tend to gain weight as we age, even if our caloric intake and exercise regimens remain unchanged.
Department: Pumping Irony
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PUMPING IRONY: Hungry and Hopeless
By Craig CoxA quiet epidemic of malnutrition has spread among the nation’s elderly, and Congress has only a few weeks to figure out how to respond.
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PUMPING IRONY: A Healthy Pessimism?
By Craig CoxDo optimists live longer than pessimists? Maybe, but I’m not the only one arguing that a middle way may yield healthier benefits.
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PUMPING IRONY: No Home for the Unhealthy
By Craig CoxAn old friend faces a future with Parkinson’s and an eventual move to an assisted-living facility that, barring an industry shift, will probably offer no medical care.
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PUMPING IRONY: Shock Treatment
By Craig CoxRecent research suggests that a simple regimen of electrical stimulation may extend lifespan. I just wish it didn’t involve my ears.
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PUMPING IRONY: This Is Your Brain on Drugs
By Craig CoxFor this drug-averse geezer, recent research suggesting that long-term use of certain pharmaceuticals may contribute to dementia makes me even less likely to follow my doctor’s advice.
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PUMPING IRONY: Risky Business
By Craig CoxThe elderly often climb on the operating table unprepared for the risks of surgery. New guidelines aim to help them — and their doctors — make more informed decisions.
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PUMPING IRONY: A Vague Recollection
By Craig CoxAt my age, I’m often at a loss when trying to retrieve some bit of information from my memory banks. A new study suggests brain games and other mentally stimulating activities may help — sort of.
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PUMPING IRONY: Die Hard
By Craig CoxA new government report paints a dismal portrait of hospice care in the United States. And regulatory agencies are powerless to respond.
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PUMPING IRONY: The DIY Dilemma
By Craig CoxAge and affluence have limited my opportunities to embark on home-improvement projects, but a neighbor’s request for help resurrects my sense of usefulness.
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PUMPING IRONY: A Matter of Trust
By Craig CoxOnly about a third of Americans say they have faith in doctors, a fact that may say more about the system than about the physicians.
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PUMPING IRONY: Too Much of a Good Thing?
By Craig CoxExercise offers antiaging benefits as does a popular drug. So combining them should boost longevity, right? Not so much.
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PUMPING IRONY: We All Fall Down
By Craig CoxElderly Americans are dying from falls at an alarming rate. I’m counting on some lessons learned through painful experience to help me avoid that fate.
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PUMPING IRONY: Memories of the Mundane
By Craig CoxYou don’t need to check off items on a bucket list to convince yourself that you’ve lived a full life. Some of the most memorable experiences occur with no planning whatsoever.
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PUMPING IRONY: Ignorance Is Bliss
By Craig CoxPrecision medicine hopes to revolutionize healthcare by revealing everything that’s going on in your body. It seems I’m not the only one who would prefer to be left in the dark.
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PUMPING IRONY: Camera Shy
By Craig Cox24/7 surveillance may deter abuse in long-term care facilities, but even its advocates admit it’s no panacea.
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PUMPING IRONY: Teacher’s Pet
By Craig CoxA new poll suggests domesticated animals are a great source of stress relief for geezers. My relationship with our elderly neurotic cat tells me it’s not nearly that simple.
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PUMPING IRONY: A Plethora of Paradoxes
By Craig CoxWith a new study suggesting that restorative sleep depends on the same cellular dysfunction that accelerates aging, I’m left to choose between the lesser of two evils — while trying to keep my spouse happy.
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PUMPING IRONY: Mindful of Mortality
By Craig CoxA casual conversation takes a fatalistic turn, challenging my belief in the infinite moment.
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PUMPING IRONY: A Coalition of the Confused?
By Craig CoxAre my boomer compatriots so easily influenced by fake news on social-media sites that they’re presenting a serious threat to civic life? I’m not so sure.
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PUMPING IRONY: Goodbye to All That
By Craig CoxWith my grandson moving away, I’m struggling to balance expectations against the inevitability of change.