Pumping Irony

Craig Cox, EL’s managing editor and resident geezer, explores the joys and challenges of aging well.

Recently in Bicycling Category

Experience Life Magazine

Pedal to the Mettle

Thursday is yoga day (when I can get away from work) and every other Thursday (more or less) means a trip to the acupuncturist for needles and a nap, and today I hit the duplecta and made it to both Zen-inducing experiences in one afternoon.

People talk about “hot” yoga or vinyasa “flow” and such, but Jinjer Stanton’s class at Nokomis Yoga is more like “geezer flow,” which is just how I and My Lovely Wife (who never misses a session) and the other two or three regulars prefer it. It’s an hour and a half of ungainly poses, charitable teaching, and a fair amount of comical banter that nonetheless leaves me feeling better than when I arrived.

I hadn’t been back to class since we arrived home from London a couple of weeks ago, so I was happy to see that attendance hadn’t improved to the point that any young faces were occupying mats on the studio floor. In fact, it was just three of us and Jinjer, who was her old self, laughing uncontrollably at the slightest suggestion of humor and leading us gingerly through sun salutations and eagle poses (“Use the wall if you feel the need. . . .”)

Then it was back on my bicycle for a trip three or so miles north to see Dr. Needle, who happily aligns my chi a couple of times a month to keep me vertical and functioning. I had no complaints to report today, which always seems to please her. (I suppose she figures something must be working.) But she sticks a few needles in strategic places nonetheless and I lie back in the barcalounger for a little snooze. Forty-five minutes later, she returns, extracts her needles and I depart feeling rested and, I suppose, realigned in some way. (I’ll never understand acupuncture, but I figure it can’t do me any harm, right?)

Then it’s back on the bike for a leisurely ride along the greenway to West River Parkway and home. When I’m able to make it to both of these sessions, like I did today, I accumulate about 10 miles of pedaling — in mostly a leisurely fashion. And that amounts to a pretty great day.

Experience Life Magazine

An Accidental Triathlon

My Lovely Wife and I recently spent four days at Itasca State Park, where we hiked among 200-year-old pines, spied a pair of nesting swans, and completed our first triathlon.

Let me explain.

For those of you unfamiliar with the latter activity, a brief description is required: Your basic triathlon consists of swimming 1.5 kilometers (.93 mile) followed by a 40-kilometer (25 mile) bike ride followed by a 10K (6.2 mile) run. There are, however, several variations, including a shorter “sprint” triathlon and the absurdly grueling “Ironman,” in which competitors swim 2.4 miles, ride 112 miles and then cool down by running a marathon.

I’ve never considered competing in one of these for one practical reason (I would drown before I reached the bike stage) and one conceptual reason (I simply can’t conceive of spending an entire day punishing my body without having something concrete to show for it, like a pile of rubble sledgehammered out of a former sidewalk). Now that’s gratifying in a way that a 10K run will never be.

So, as you might imagine, we had no thought of triathlons when we set off on our bicycles from the Douglas Lodge toward the headwaters of the Mississippi River five miles away. It just sort of happened.

The afternoon was hot and muggy, and MLW packed her swimming suit in the event that she encountered an inviting body of water along the way. Nothing comforts her bum right knee like a cool dip. And it became pretty clear pretty early on the bike trail that that bum right knee was going to need some comforting. She’s an intrepid cyclist and has been known to pedal up to 20 miles at a time, but this trail had more peaks and valleys than the Dow Jones Industrials, and we soon found ourselves walking our bikes up some of the steepest hills and coasting down into the valleys.

About four miles into our trek, we came upon a swimming beach and MLW happily donned her swimwear and dove in while I kept an eye on our gear and waded along the shore. I don’t know how much distance she covered out there by the buoys, but it was a good long swim, and she emerged refreshed and ready to take on the hills again.

More pedaling and walking ensued until we reached the headwaters. We parked the bikes and dangled our feet in the not-so-mighty Mississippi for a while, before saddling up again and heading back to the lodge. It was quite a workout, and it occurred to me later that it probably qualifies as a swim-cycle-run event, even if we didn’t really run and I didn’t actually swim and we didn’t follow the usual order.

So, if you’d like to try it, this is approximately the drill:

• Bicycle until you reach a hill you can’t climb.

• Dismount and walk (or run) your bike up the hill.

• Mount up again and pedal happily down the hill and along the trail until you reach the next troublesome hill.

• Repeat above activities for about 4 miles or until you reach an inviting body of water.

• Go into the water: Actually immersing yourself and employing some basic swimming motion is preferred, but just wading by the shore is OK.

• Climb on your bicycle again and repeat sweaty pedaling and walking/running activity for another mile or until you reach the source of a notable river.

• Dismount and dangle feet in water until tourists with cameras drive you away.

• Get back on your bike and do the whole pedal-and-walk/run deal for five miles to the finish line, detouring along the way if you encounter an ancient graveyard or other points of interest.

Like most amateur triathlons, our “accidental triathlon” isn’t really a race. It’s more like a really long workout — equal parts enjoyment and annoyance. OK, maybe more annoyance than enjoyment. Those hills were killers.

Experience Life Magazine

Spring Fling

As I think I’ve mentioned before, I typically put my bicycle away each fall when the first snow flies and start pedaling again when the streets are clear in the spring. It’s an act of self-preservation, I suppose, and a nod to convention. I can walk to work. And for longer trips, there’s always the automobile. That’s what they’re designed to do. Why not take advantage of them?
My Lovely Wife, on the other hand, enjoys bicycling year-round, and nothing short of a major snowfall will keep her and her bike off the street in the winter. Bicycling is her favorite mode of exercise — it’s good for her grumpy right knee, it gets her heart pumping, it’s all accomplished in the fresh and bracing outdoor air, and at the end of the trail there’s usually a coffee shop. Plus, it’s kind of a point of pride for her. She likes to compare notes with other winter cyclists, most of whom fit in a rather different demographic.
So, MLW has been happily pedaling around town since our recent thaw, and on Saturday afternoon was planning to head to the East Lake Library to pick up a few printmaking books she had on hold. We also needed to restock our pantry, so the excursion seemed to call for more conventional transportation. But, by the time we got around to running errands, Mr. Parkour (who has no interest in bicycles) had already claimed the car.
While the weather was not what I would call balmy (temps in the 20s and a northwest wind), the sun was shining and the pavement outside our house seemed relatively free of ice. And it occurred to me that climbing on my bike might not be out of the question.
For those of you who have never bicycled in below-freezing weather, I should point out here that bicycling in those temperatures can be quite unpleasant, regardless of road conditions. Exposed skin and even unexposed extremities (toes and fingers, especially) can go numb pretty quickly, because — in my experience, anyway — your body’s not working nearly as hard as it is when you’re walking.
I wouldn’t think twice about walking the 2 miles or so to the library in this kind of weather. A half-mile into the journey, I’d have my hat off and scarf loosened. Not so much on a bicycle. So, in considering such an excursion, I needed to consider whether my current winter wardrobe was up to the job, whether my bicycle was still in operable condition, and whether I was emotionally prepared to endure a certain amount of physical discomfort.
This is not a debate that MLW entertains. She casts a casual glance out the window. “Let’s go for it!” she says.
So, I get bundled up as best I can and tromp out to the garage, where my old Schwinn has been snoozing since November. I check the tires and brake pads and off we go.
They say that once you’ve learned how to ride a bicycle, you never unlearn it. But I’m always surprised when I climb on board again each spring that it feels like no time has passed since my last ride. This was the case on Saturday. And that was a good thing, because there were plenty of puddles and glacial ice to maneuver around just to get through the alley and out to the street.
(A note for those of you who may be conjuring images of two sleek bicyclists in high-tech, winterized spandex perched on racing bikes: Not so much. Lots of people climb on their $1,500 Treks and pedal 50 miles at 20 MPH for a little weekend cardio. That’s not us. We go slow. I’ve had joggers pass me on hills.)
Anyway, we wind our way north and west toward Lake and Minnehaha, mindful of the potholes and icy remnants of the last plowing at intersections, and I’m struck, after four months of walking, by how much faster you can travel on a bicycle. This may seem pretty obvious, but when you’ve been employing one form of transport for an extended period of time, it’s striking how different another can feel.
And it’s not just faster; it’s almost effortless by comparison. My legs are pushing down on the pedals, but my arms aren’t moving, my feet aren’t striking the ground and pushing off, my ankles aren’t flexing. As a result, my toes are beginning to go numb and my thumbs under my mittens are losing their feeling. What’s odd, though, is to look around and see drivers in passing cars wearing light jackets and pedestrians on the sidewalk in hoodies, hands bare.
Locking our bikes outside the library, I suddenly feel overdressed. Not because I’m too warm, but because everyone around me is dressed like it’s April and I look like I just blew into town from Nome.
MLW picks up her books and we saddle up to head south again to pick up provisions. My thumbs have reached that fascinating point beyond numbness, where they actually feel like they’re warming up. The toes on my left foot haven’t received the memo, but the wind is now at our backs and we zip along at what feels to me like quite a clip until a couple of young guys on fixed-gear bikes whoosh past us near the parkway roundabout. We head west and catch a little late lunch at our favorite bakery and then fill my basket with some dinner fixings before heading home.
All told, we probably traveled a bit over 6 miles — a trip that later this spring will seem as routine as my morning commute — and managed to avoid any traction-related mishaps, leaving me with the notion that maybe spring has officially sprung and it’s time to adopt the bicycling habit once again.
Outside my window, though, I notice it’s begun snowing. And another thought intrudes: What’s the hurry?

Experience Life Magazine

The Great Outdoors







Winter is giving
way to spring around here, which makes my morning and evening walking commutes
both exhilarating and treacherous. Patches of ice materialize at inopportune
times, so mindful walking is the order of the day: one foot in front of the other.
I’ve managed to maintain my footing so far, unlike My Lovely Wife, who has
taken a couple of tumbles this winter.

 

I should point
out by way of explanation, though, that MLW is outside a lot in the winter. She’s one of those people who hates to exercise
indoors. She’d much rather brave the glacial ruts on our winter streets on her
bicycle than climb on a stationary bike at the gym. As she puts it, “When I’m
riding my bike, I like to go somewhere.”

 

It’s all about
fresh air and adventure for her, but it appears that she also has some research
on her side: She’s getting a better workout outside than she would get at the
gym. And that’s the case whether you’re cycling, running or even rowing,
according to Gina Kolata’s story in today’s NY
Times
.
Kolata queries several researchers and fitness experts on the
differences between indoor and outdoor workouts and highlights the subtle — and
not so subtle — ways in which exercising out in the elements can push you
harder.

 

Some of these
are obvious (running or pedaling into the wind is tougher than doing it
indoors), but others are more subtle. For instance, the flat surface of a
treadmill won’t work your foot muscles the way an uneven running surface does;
and riding a real bicycle outside demands the kind of muscle coordination (for
balance and steering) that you can’t develop on a stationary bike.

 

Personally, I
prefer the gym. I’ll break out the old Schwinn when the ice finally retreats in
a few weeks (and some of the scarier potholes have been filled), but I’ve never
been one to crank out a 20-mile ride on a Saturday afternoon, just for the fun
of it. So, I doubt that my indoor workout regimen will have much effect on my
cycling proficiency. As long as I stay vertical, I’m pretty happy. Nor do I
have much interest in any serious outdoor (or indoor, for that matter) jogging
come spring. If I can get the dog out for a walk once a week, that would be
considered a triumph.

 

It’s not that
MLW is training for the Tour de France, either. Her knees are pretty creaky.
But that daily bike ride is a pretty important part of her fitness regimen.
Plus, it makes her happy. As long as she stays upright.

Experience Life Magazine

No Car, No Problem







It’s not often that we’re
treated to temps in the 60s in November around here, so My Lovely Wife and I
were able to spend a good portion of the weekend out and about on foot and on
our bicycles (the Crapmobile’s right front wheel is making calamitous sounds, as well, so we left it in the
driveway).

 

Saturday morning, we pedaled
down to Minnehaha Falls and descended into the creek gorge below the cascade
and hiked part of the way to the river. There are points along this trail where
you can actually escape all signs of the city. It’s a fabulous little urban
getaway.

 

We weren’t feeling too
ambitious though, as MLW’s knee was starting to act up. So, we hiked back to
the falls and climbed on our bikes (which always helps our creaky knees) to
explore the bluffs between the creek gorge and the river where the state
veteran’s home is located. I’m guessing that they don’t get a lot of bicycle traffic
over there, because we got some strange looks from folks as we wound our way
among the historic and contemporary buildings that make up this little village
above the river. All in all, a lovely morning.

 

I got in a little indoor
workout Sunday morning: pushups and some kettlebell exercises that got my heart
pumping pretty good. I’m always a little amazed at what a great cardio workout
you can get by spending just a few minutes swinging a kettlebell around. These
kettlebell swings are particularly invigorating.

 

Later in the day, with rain
threatening, MLW and I once again climbed aboard our bicycles — this time for a
meeting near downtown Minneapolis, about six miles away. (The whole carless
thing makes for a more adventurous life, I think.) The wind was at our back,
though, so before long, MLW was shedding her fashionable plaid jacket and we
rolled to our destination without breaking a sweat.

 

Note: Our meeting took place
at a neighborhood pub, so I enjoyed a pint of Surly Furious, even though I felt
like I hadn’t actually earned it.

 

Then, it was off to the
co-op, a mile or so distant, to buy exactly two bags of groceries (another
thing about carless shopping: you can’t buy more than you can cart home) and a
pleasant ride along the river back home. The rain held off.

 

As I write this, the
Crapmobile is sitting in the shop awaiting a diagnosis. And as much as I
appreciate the healthy benefits we gain from leaving our cranky old vehicle in
the driveway, I’d really miss it when the snow begins to fly.

Experience Life Magazine

Weekend Workout

The holiday weekend lacked fireworks, though our neighbor outfitted his front yard with a red, white and blue light show featuring the music of John Phillip Sousa, Bruce Springsteen and Ray Charles (the latter singing his own stirring rendition of “America the Beautiful”), which debuted the evening of July 3 with much fanfare and, perhaps owing to a visit or two from less patriotic neighbors, did not favor us with an Independence Day encore. 

I declared my independence from the gym these past three days, which is not to say I hung out in a hammock (wish I had one) sucking on a succession of ice cold Budweisers (I prefer Grain Belt). Nope. There were errands to run, and when there are errands to run, My Lovely Wife and I run them on our bicycles. That meant about 10 miles in the St. Paul hill country (actually 5 miles up, 5 miles down) on Friday, a short ride (2 miles) to downtown Nokomis on Saturday (after a glorious rain shower) and another 8 miles or so to a vacationing friend’s house to feed her cats this afternoon.

Between all the cycling (and sore hamstrings, glutes, etc.), there was gardening, gardening and a bit more gardening. Lots of bending, squatting and other moves that remind me of my age and the relative appeal of yoga. Plus, I dragged out the extension ladder and cleaned out the gutters without succumbing to heat stroke and toppling to a tragic death. All in all, a pretty active three days, even though I never got around to strapping on my heart-rate monitor.

Experience Life Magazine

A Brave New Direction?

Directions-small.jpgIt’s been about a week now since I made it downstairs to the gym (lots of evening work recently), so I can’t say I’ve been very diligent on the exercise front. I have been bicycling into the office every day, a practice that has been made more challenging by winds that have threatened to sweep me and my Schwinn off the bridge and into the watery depths below. I’ve also been neglecting my morning Oz push-up/plank routine, which I guess means I’ve hit another plateau.

I have continued to log my food choices into FitDay, though, which has contributed to a gradual erosion of poundage from my chassis; at my weigh-in last Thursday I tipped the scales at 159, the first time I’ve been under 160 in I don’t know how long. The whole food journal thing does have the effect of forcing me to eat more mindfully (most of the time).

A couple of overtures from My Lovely Wife to join her in a yoga class have come to naught. There’s something about yoga (perhaps my complete lack of flexibility?) that mutes its appeal, I’m afraid.

All in all, it seems I’m caught in a rut. Maybe my mild FitDay obsession is overtaking what’s left of my exercise obsession. You know: If you don’t want to exercise, just stop eating (don’t try this at home). Or maybe I just need to come up with a new regimen.

Let’s see: If I were to map out my ideal weekly workout, what would it be?

• Bicycling every day, for sure (how else am I going to get to work?).
• A little basketball once a week.
• Lifting three times a week.
• Long-distance fat-burning cardio twice a week (with my friend, the Elliptical Death Machine).

So, what if, beginning next week, I scheduled Mon.-Wed.-Fri. for strength-training (some in The Pit, some with the machines), Tues.-Thur. for a long stint (45 minutes?) on the EDM, and a Sunday afternoon on the basketball court? That would get me off the dime. Shake things up a bit.

Let’s take a look at the calendar, then: Hmm. Monday’s Memorial Day, Wednesday I’ll be out of town, Friday is kind of up in the air, schedule-wise. . . .

I’ll get back to you on this, OK?

Directions courtesy Wikipedia.

Experience Life Magazine

There and Back and Back Again

So, I skipped the gym on Friday but made up for it on Saturday. Not on the lifting front — unless you count flipping burgers on the grill (yum!) — but I got plenty of cardio.

Weekend mornings around here tend toward leisure: tea and the newspaper, speculation on whether The Boy (AKA Martin, 18) will rise in time for dinner, and perhaps a trip to the co-op to restock the pantry. But Saturday, My Lovely Wife had other ideas. So, we climbed on our bicycles and headed (into a fierce northwestern wind) for the downtown library, some 6 miles north — with a breakfast stop at the Citizen Cafe (“Food for the People”) on 38th Street, about a fourth of the way to our ultimate destination.

Properly fueled (try the Organic Scramble), we resumed our journey into the intermittently gale-force winds, and a half-hour or so later found ourselves rolling past the Metrodome, when my cell phone rang. It was my older brother, The Siding Mogul, inviting me to join him at the Dome later that evening for a Twins game. He always has great seats (who knew vinyl siding could be so lucrative?), so I happily agreed to meet him later — just a few blocks from where I was standing at the time.

We resumed our trek into the wind tunnel that was 3rd Street and eventually coasted to a stop at our new, cantilevered downtown library, where we intended to rest our weary knees and dive into a little local history research for MOQ, the quarterly zine we publish. I was happy to use the elevator to get to the Special Collections section on the fourth floor.

An hour or so later, we were back on our bikes heading south, past the Metrodome, wind at our backs, knees happily pumping away as we zipped over the Sabo Bicycle Bridge (just for fun), under the Lake Street light rail station, and along the Hiawatha Avenue Bike Freeway toward home.

All along the way, I’m thinking: Am I going ride all the way back to the Metrodome in a couple of hours? There’s always the train, of course. And the forecast spoke of rain. But the train is so packed at the Metrodome station that I’m always forced to walk to the next station up the line to avoid the chaos. Wouldn’t it be nice to just jump on the bike and pedal home? But, then I’d have to buck that wind going in, though it would be at my back going home. You get the idea.

We fired up the grill and enjoyed the aforementioned burgers, MLW departed for her daily bike ride to the coffee shop, and I was left to ponder the imponderable (see above). I was supposed to meet The Siding Mogul “around 5:30″ and it was already closing in on 5. I could walk the four blocks to the train station and be there in plenty of time, but I grabbed my rain jacket, stuffed it into my basket and started pedaling instead.

The wind was still an affront to all bicycling humanity (at least those of us heading north) and I could feel my hammies burning after just a few blocks. Though I’ve made the trip downtown hundreds of  times over the years, I really had no idea how long it might take me to cut through the gale, so I was checking the time at every opportunity. Around 38th Street, my phone rang. It was The Siding Mogul letting me know that he was running late.

I caught my breath, downshifted into a more comfortable gear, and pedaled slowly on. It was barely 5:15. I rolled up to the Dome a mere 15 minutes later, slightly stunned by how quickly I’d covered my third 6-mile leg of the day. The Siding Mogul was nowhere to be seen, of course, so I locked up my bike and spent the next half-hour smugly congratulating myself on my athletic prowess and the brilliance of my transportation choice.

The Siding Mogul did have great seats. The Twins pounded on the Angels. And three hours later I was back out on the sidewalk unhitching my steed for the gallop home. Bonus: It was not raining.

In fact, it was a gorgeous evening, and I flew down the Bicycle Freeway with much more joy than effort, covering the fourth of my four 6-mile trips that day in what felt like record time. Only when I closed the garage door and strode toward the house, however, did I begin to feel the creakiness in my left knee.

The next day, the back of my knee was swollen and tender, and I confined myself to my desk chair for most of the day. And it was raining today, so I left the bicycle in the garage. It’s supposed to be sunny tomorrow. But I’m thinking 5 miles, OK? And I think I’ll skip the stationary bike at the gym, if you don’t mind.